Wednesday, November 23, 2011



So you can get the feeling in your ears about how this word sounds, pronounce it out-loud where no one can hear you kao na hrvati jezik.  Hmmmmmm.  What means "Huadajahant?"   What jezik is this?

Now look here, I have been answering comments and fan letters in about fifteen different languages almost everyday and yesterday there were two more languages popped up.  That's not to say that I speak or write any of them very well.  I don't even speak good on standard hrvati and even after nearly obtaining a major on English jezik from university, proper engleski eludes me sometimes but you can see I write on teksikanski jako dobro.  But  what means "Huadajahant?" ????


That is exactly how I was greeted by the drive-up squawk box at Starbucks on ulica 802 u Brownsville two mornings ago. 

For those of you who may not know what is a Starbucks,  je kafena, only they really do serve coffee and tea.  Starbucks is maybe similar to Tim Horton's in Canada, another kafena.  Perhaps the difference between the two is that where Tim Horton's caters heavily to blue collar tastes, Starbucks caters more to the Yuppie type crowd with upscale desserts and such.  In fact, Starbucks is the epitome of the non-greedy, socially responsible corporation all the "Occupy" people are screaming for these  days and they were socially responsible already long before it became politically correct to be so.   Their prices reflect how costly it is to be socially responsible too.  No one goes to Starbucks for the cheap prices.  You go for the smiles and the camaraderie.

A glance at the license plates on the vehicles around the Brownsville Starbuck's shows it is a favorite excursion for the more well to do from Matamoros. You can always tell when a drug dealer's children are over for the morning because daddy sends along a couple of armed guards who discretely keep a sharp eye on them. I always feel safer when they are around because these guys simply will not allow any trouble around the young folks they are sent to watch over.

Anyway, as I drove up to the squawk box, a female voice said:  "Huadajahant?"

Me:  "molim?"

"Huadajahant?" responds the female voice (this time snarly and impatient).

Quickly I checked my zipper and made sure my shirt was buttoned up all the way.  My teeth were in and my hair was combed.  I had even showered earlier that morning. What ever had I done to offend the creature on the other end of this conversation?

"Huadjahant?"  This time her voice rose with that angry woman sound that so terrifies the heart of any man.

"Please, what is bold this morning?"  I asked plaintively.

"Mmpf," she responded.

"Dobro, dobro, a vente with five sugar and lots of half and half, molim." I say, hoping for the best.

"Rmpf!" she said.

"please also a classic sausage with egg on engleski muffin," I added.

"Nga," she responded impatiently.

Nga?  Oh oh, what means this word??  I googled "nga" on my phone.  No luck.  Oh oh.

"Nga," she repeated flatly.  "Nga day."

"Perhaps please a cheese danish?"  I was desperate now.

"Nga! Drajup!" she said curtly.

"Molim?" I asked, now almost in tears.

"Drajup now!!"  she squawked emphatically.

Not knowing what else to do, I drove up to the window. A young woman almost threw my coffee at me. She was not wearing a name badge in view.  After I handed my credit card to her I was suddenly sure that a gang of bandits had taken over my beloved Starbucks and I would never see that card again.  Real Starbucks employees always wear name badges proudly and publicly in open view.  "I might be lucky to escape with my life," I thought.  Not a single drug lord guard in sight!!!  Oh heavens where are they when you need them?   Can you imagine how relieved I was when she slammed my credit card into my hand in just a few moments?  Whew!!!  As I drove away, I noticed the patio in front of the store was empty. Hmmmm, scary, really scary.

So yesterday morning I went back just to see how things were. I drove up to the squawk box. 

A pleasant voice greeted me:  "Good morning, my name is Alex, how may I serve you?"

In seconds she set me up with my coffee, my sandwich, and my danish!!!!  When I arrived at the window Alex had a badge which said "Alex" on it too.  I tipped her a dollar.

I went back today.  "Good morning, my name is Alex ..." 

I asked which coffee was the bold for today.  "Ohhh, dobro jutro gospodin David!!  Italia is bold all week!"  She didn't say my name "Day vid" either, but "Da veed" with the accent on the first syllable like my mother named me too and not with the accent on the second syllable like the Meksikanski say it!!! She even remembered what I had ordered the day before so in seconds I was at the window where she handed me a bag with my sandwich and my danish.  A minute later came the coffee.  Alex smiled when I tipped her a dollar again today.

"Huadajahant?"  But never mind that, my old Starbucks is back and all is well in the world, thanks God.

do sljedeći put, blagoslov - until next time, blessings,
Canovals a.k.a. Slavonac
23 studenog 2011

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